Envious of Mitt? Raise Bees!!!

This column first appeared @ E-Crap in 2012

So today, Mitt Romney gave us the gem that income inequality or anything related to it is all about envy. Wall Street, financial institutions, 99%, Super-PAC's… all envy. It's odd that someone with his privileged educational background could be so, um, what's the word… stupid. But he is. Or he just doesn't care. which is more likely the reason. He realizes that half the population of our great nation is, well, stupid. So why not try to relate to them that way? If Mitt Romney cared about anyone other than himself, his financial friends, or his clueless constituents, he might realize that "99%er's" are not envious - they are angry. Angry that politicians are bought. President Obama will be spending $1 billion in his re-election campaign. Where do you think this money is coming from? Your $5 contribution? It would take 200 million of those, so not likely. No they are coming from Wall Street, pharmaceutical companies, oil companies, and even celebrities.
Celebrities? Yeah. How about someone like ageless rocker Jon Bon Jovi. JBJ hosted an Obama fundraiser at his riverfront estate which cost over $30,000 per person. Obama repaid the favor by placing Jon on one of his Advisory Boards in 2010. And… guess how much property taxes Bon Jovi paid in 2010. In case you didn't know, Jon Bon Jovi, multi-millionaire and owner of absolute prime riverfront real estate in NJ's swankiest Navesink River area, paid $100 in NJ property taxes in 2010. How? He raises bees on his property, which gives him this tax break. You can't make this stuff up, folks.
But it's all okay, middle class, because the Mitt Romney tax plan is on it's way! Oh wait… the plan will not help middle class? Sure it will! Mitt said so himself! Everyone making over $250K will have their taxes reduced! Oh, you don't make that much? Sorry, you are not middle class. Actually, Romney's plan gives about 60% of its benefits to the richest 1% of Americans, and preserves all the loopholes that people like Jon Bon Jovi and himself enjoy. 
Do you wonder why Mitt Romney will not release his tax returns? Well, he owns six houses, and at least one of them is worth about $12 million. And get this… Mitt filed to BULLDOZE that house and plans to replace the beachfront 3,009 square foot house with one 11,062 square feet. Jokingly, Vanity Fair named, among others, a few things that will fit INSIDE Romney's new house - Jennifer Aniston's old house, The Memphis-area Enterprise Rent-a-Car facility, and the Music Hall of Williamsburg. Oh, he also owns a $10 million vacation home in NH, a Utah ski lodge worth $5 million, and a few others. Yet, we can be pretty sure that Mitt Romney pays less in tax than you do. Scary isn't it? 
So next time you want to get angry at Mitt Romney, please don't. You'll only sound envious. BTW, I am a registered Republican that voted for Obama. I personally think Obama has done a poor job, and had hoped for an alternative because he promised so much and delivered so little (reference the $1 billion Super-PAC mention above - Hey Mr. President, what ever happened to that panel you were going to form against gas price gouging a couple of, um, years ago?). But sadly, Mitt Romney has made me face having to vote for ABM (Anyone But Mitt). You know what, I'll vote for the best third-party candidate I can find instead, and then I will become the best damn beekeeper in the country!

Kaneman, telling it like it is. For E-Crap.com.


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